In the long stretch of isolation and social distancing we got a little desperate for television. I don’t normally make a habit of watching the Hallmark Channel, but sadly, yes, one night it was on. I wasn’t paying much attention to the show until I heard an actress intone, “Remember, a life without love is no life at all.”
You’re seriously telling me that the beautiful, successful woman onscreen with perfect hair, skinny thighs, a good job, and close circle of friends has no life because she doesn’t have a man?
Myth: A widely held but false belief or idea
As crazy as it sounds when it’s spoken out loud, there are many single women who buy into this myth. They are walking around believing the false idea that their lives aren’t good, fulfilling, complete, or effective because they aren’t married.
Ladies, it’s time to embrace our single lives. Stop telling yourself lies and start celebrating!
My Ten Favorite Reasons to Celebrate Singleness:
- Not being accountable to anyone else- I get to make my own decisions.
A friend and I were talking about this the other night. We were commenting about how nice it is to have the freedom to control the thermostat. You can also choose the color of your house, plant as many flowers as you want, always listen to the music you like… and, well, you get the idea. It’s great!
2. Being forced into hard things
Singleness definitely makes me stronger/ braver. I realized that the other day when I was killing a wasp with a broom while a married woman hid in another room. She was used to someone else doing the extermination for her. When you’re on your own, if you don’t step up and tackle the tough stuff then no one will.
3. Learning life skills
Life skills go along with doing hard things. Not only do single women have to kill the bugs, but many of them also have to install faucets, rip out carpet, paint walls, move heavy furniture, or (my least favorite thing ever) go to the hardware store alone. Life hacks and YouTube are our friends.
4. Quiet, solitary walks with God
I’ll say this over and over again, because solitude is something God is really speaking to my heart about. I always used to feel sad and lonely when I hiked by myself; my hikes were typically filled with emotional prayers begging God for a husband to walk with. I wanted someone to hold hands with so badly! In the last few months, though, I’ve been learning to differentiate between loneliness and solitude. Just because I’m alone doesn’t mean I have to feel lonely. Solitude- time to think, walk, pray, reflect- is a beautiful thing.
5. Getting to eat whatever I want and never having to worry about cooking
Cooking is an area I consistently struggle with. In all the years I’ve lived on my own I’ve never gotten the hang of cooking for one. I either make waaaaay too much and have to eat the same thing for days, or the extras get shoved to the back of the fridge until they morph into something new. Finding time to cook every night is difficult, too, plus all the dishes are a pain. Let’s just say I’m thankful for cereal and smoothies!
Is there any better reason to celebrate singleness? Enough said.
7. More opportunities to serve
I recently wrote a post about why we should volunteer. This is something I feel strongly about. Yes, single women have freedom and extra time, but that doesn’t mean we should hoard it all for ourselves. As Christians, it’s even more important. Jesus was the ultimate example of a servant. When we practice service, we’re following Him.
8. I get to be the fun aunt
It can be very painful to be a childless woman. You feel like you have failed in the ultimate “womanly” duty. God made us to have children, right? Women are naturally empathetic and nurturing- the maternal feelings don’t go away just because you don’t have kids. For me, being an aunt is incredibly satisfying. I get to experience all the best parts of having kids, without having to deal with pregnancy, labor, sleepless night, diapers, and saving for college. It’s the perfect set-up.
9. Chances to get to know family more
Along with being the fun aunt, I’m so thankful that being single gives me more chances to spend time with my extended family. My family members are my road trip-travel-try crazy new things-watch ridiculous movies-hang out and talk for hours-people. I couldn’t be more grateful for them.
10..Having to rely on God for so many things
I saved this one for last because it’s the most important. People are pretty good at building up their lives on their own. Everything I’ve mentioned above is great, but ultimately it means nothing without God. He is the One who truly gives purpose and fulfillment to our lives. Being single has given me multiple opportunities to rely on God because, sometimes, there’s simply no one else around.
Over and over again I’ve had to throw up my hands and give a situation over to God because I couldn’t see any way out of it. And yes, there are times that I’ve sat on the couch and cried and said, “God, I really wish you had arms right now,” but I’ve also seen Him work in so amazing ways.
My life was created for God’s glory and my good.
I absolutely believe that, and I hope you do, too. Lean into God, surrender your life to Him, and watch Him make it more beautiful than you could imagine.
This week, I’m thankful for the blessing of singleness. Yes, I said it. Together, let’s celebrate every SINGLE blessing!